Learning and Growing

God has been teaching me and making me aware of some things lately.  Just yesterday, at church, my assistant pastor talked about being fearfully and wonderfully made; and that one of the most important uses of our minds is to know God.   Then, for Harvest America, I reviewed some of the talking points needed for counselors.  It was a blessing to see the whole event come together; and we were able to rejoice that a couple of people placed their faith in Christ or made recommitments.

Also, I've still been thinking about what it means to have God as our inheritance, for we are now part of the "royal priesthood".   Some of the things I've thought of, is that we have access to all of Who God Is.   He provides for us and sustains us, just as the inheritance of land would've done for the tribes of Israel.  Also, He is a treasure that we can "pass on" to others who become part of the Family of God.

Another thing that He has repeatedly spoken to me, is that I should find the Joy in Living.   It began with the Ecclesiastes study, and then, I read about it in "Unfinished", and saw it referenced in "The Trial" movie.  There have also been other references here and there.   It is something that I probably should work on; since, my attitude lately has more been towards wanting to be in the presence of the LORD, for "to die is gain".   Yet, I am still in God's presence here on earth, and while I am here, it makes sense to live joyfully.

Then, I've been thinking about what to write on COA for my church newsletter.  We've been serving now for over 3 years in this outreach; and it is neat to see that how God is at work.   The gospel message is clearly given and we have seen lives touched.  It is an opportunity for me to be "the hands and feet" of Christ to the homeless and needy in the community; and to be able to show His compassion and love to others.

7-Oct:  A good verse I came across as I was looking for Scripture to include in the newsletter article was "And don't forget to do good and to share with those in need. These are the sacrifices that please God."  (Hebrews 13:16, NLT)

31-Oct:  God seemed to be opening up views into singleness and marriage this past year with the dates, the book I just read, and awareness of the Boundless MarryWell site.  This Sunday's message at church is supposed to be on singleness, as my pastor has been going through a series on family and home.  Even today, I'm listening to a Focus on the Family broadcast on "Navigating Dating and the Single Life" with Lisa Anderson from Boundless.  She talked about many of the things that I have faced as well - feeling that as singles we are "no one's most important person".   We should also not be afraid to be intentional in desiring marriage; and because marriage is a reflection of God's character, it is under attack and we need to have a healthy perspective of marriage.  We are to remember that marriage formation starts while we are still single, learning to build and maintain relationships, gaining Biblical perspectives, etc.

Cooking Fish

My experience with cooking fish has had its ups and downs.  For the longest time, I even avoided it altogether, since it would leave the whole house smelling like fish for days.   However, I've found that certain ways of cooking fish cause less of a residual odor than others.

Steaming fish seems to leave a strong odor for a long time.  Quick pan fry less so; and small fish chunks work well for the dishes I've been cooking.  Baking can leave a lingering odor; but, one that worked fairly well was to broil (such as miso teriyaki salmon).

However, it wasn't until this weekend, that I feel like I've finally cooked fish really well.   It's a simple pan fry.   Salt and Pepper the fish; heat pan (not too hot) and oil; sear best side first (side without skin) a few minutes (rule of thumb I read was about 5 minutes per inch) until the sides look like fish was started to get done; then flip over and cook till done (NOTE:  it is best to turn over only once).   Then melt some butter and add lemon.  At end, add some herbs (like parsley).   This turned out really well.

14-Oct:  Using a similar method, I cooked fish with lemon butter and dill.  It was good, but the previous one seemed to have turned out a little better.  On the side, I also made a persian cucumber salad with dill, rice vinegar, red onions, salt, and sugar.   It was a nice light salad.

Getting Up

"For though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again, but the wicked stumble when calamity strikes." (Proverbs 24:16)

Heard this verse today; and it really stood out.  What a great verse, since it is a reminder that God helps us up when we fall.   I have experienced this myself; and it is encouraging to know that no matter how many times I fall (even when I am tripped), God will help me rise.

Luke 20-21

Despite knowing that His DEATH on the cross was within a few days, Jesus still taught in the temple proclaiming the gospel, thus showing His heart for the lost.   Then, in several rounds of verbal "battles" with the religious leaders, Jesus:

• Makes a point regarding His divine authority without having to answer the religious leaders directly
• Through a parable, clearly shows that the religious leaders will be killing the Son of God, the Cornerstone
• Wisely shows that we are to "give back to Caesar what is Caesar’s, and to God what is God’s", effectively circumventing the "trap" the religious leaders were trying to set

Jesus shows His wisdom and grace in dealing with His opposition.

As the verbal "battles" between the religious leaders and Jesus continue, the Sadducees pose a scenario and question on Levirite marriage, which in their minds exposed the absurdity of resurrection.   However, Jesus answered in such a way that showed that they are not only incorrect in their views on the resurrection, but also on angels and how things will be in eternity.  In this round, He was once again able to silence His opponents.

Jesus, then, posed a question about the Messiah; which showed that though He was a descendent of the line of David when He came to earth as a Man; but, that He was also Lord and God.  Jesus also gave a warning to His disciples against the hyprocrisy of "the teachers of the law".

Then in Chp 21, Jesus commended a poor widow who demonstrated sacrificial giving.  This is similar to when King David had said that he would not sacrifice to God anything that costs him nothing.  Also, Jesus could have been using this example as an illustration of the religious leaders "devouring widows' houses" (Luke 20:47).

As Jesus then spoke to his disciples of the coming destruction of the temple, He also answered their question about the sign of the End Times by giving them a series of signs to will indicate "that the kingdom of God is near" (False Messiahs, wars, earthquakes, famines, pestilences, signs from heaven and in the sun, moon, stars, tossing of the sea, etc).  The End Times will be a fearful "time of punishment in fulfillment of all that has been written", with distress, death, and captivity.   

Jesus also warned them of coming persecution and betrayal; but, assured them that He would "give [them] words and wisdom that none of [their] adversaries will be able to resist or contradict".  He encouraged them to stand firm, for they will know that their "redemption is drawing near".   When Jesus returns, He will "in a cloud with power and great glory".

With a parable of the fig tree, He assured them that the signs are an indication of the assured fulfillment of prophecy.  They were not to be weighed down by the world and its sins; but, to always be prepared and ready for His Return. 

Jesus continued teaching, even though His end on earth was near. 

Heaven on Earth

My small group started a new series from Dr David Jeremiah of Turning Point ministries on "Searching for Heaven on Earth" based on the book of Ecclesiastes.  So far, it's been a good reminder that we will never find true meaning "under the sun"; for the true meaning of life is found only in the SON, in God.   Asaph came to the same conclusion in Psalm 73.

One "insight" came to me as we were discussing, and when combined with what God has been teaching me about stewardship, I'm reminded that for those of God's people who have much, much will be required.  For someone like King Solomon of great wealth, much would've been expected of him, for he was given stewardship of so much.   So, from that perspective, wealth is greater responsibility, and if seen in that light, would be something that we may want to ponder before pursuing; to see if we can faithfully handle that responsibility.

Something also that was mentioned, was related to Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the LORD; And He will give you the desires of your heart".   I think I've heard it before; but, I didn't remember it.  But, a better interpretation of this verse is that rather than God giving us what we desire; it is really saying that He will give us desires, which are in line with His.

10-Oct:  In the lesson on Ecclesiastes 3, Dr Jeremiah said that if you take all the trials out of your life, it would be "vanilla".   Life is made of both with and black (sharp and flat) keys.  vs 12 emphasizes being happy and doing good; and vs 13 being thankful.

10-Jan:  The lesson on Ecclesiastes 7 is one of the best of the series so far.   The title itself "When Bad is Better" demonstrated a different perspective than usual.   Some of the "right-side up" points made were:

• Sorrow is better than Laughter - adversity can develop us as nothing else can; and it is easier to learn through adversity than prosperity for wisdom is forged through trials.  In vs 1, when Solomon said the day of our death is better than the birth; it was related to a good name.  At death, when we have lived our life well, then we die with a good name; but, at birth, we have our lifetime to affect our "name".  Man's highest purpose is not to be happy, but to know God
• Rebuke from the Wise is better than Praise of a Fool
• The Hard way is better than the Easy - similar to the first point, sometimes it is best not to look for the "short cut"; but to grow through the process of the "hard way".  We should also start with the end in mind, asking "where will this path lead me?"
• Today is better than Yesterday - In the valleys, we cannot help but turn to the LORD and see HIM high and lifted up

Overall, what we KNOW is better than what we can't figure out; so, TRUST in the LORD Who we KNOW.  Also, it was interesting that in the lesson, I made a connection with what I was focusing on last year on Loving God.  In Psalm 119:67, it showed that affliction helped the Psalmist grow in obedience; and since those who love God obeys His commandments; then, it can follow that affliction helps us to love God more.

23-Jan:  "Wisdom to be Thankful For" - In the Ecclesiastes 7:11-29 lesson, what stood out was that wisdom is better than wealth; so either in prosperity or in poverty, we can trust God.  We are not to let what we don't understand cause us not to trust HIM

5-Mar:  Folly - In Ecclesiastes 10, foolishness even in little things can cause ruin.  It can easily get into leadership, labor, and language.   He gave an acronym of H.A.R.M. for Hit and Run Mouth.   Throughout the OT, foolishness is associated with sin and wisdom with righteousness; so that acting in wisdom requires yielding to the Spirit's leading in contrast to our sinful natures

20-Mar:  "Before It's Too Late" - In Ecclesiastes 11 and 12, we are reminded that:

• Life is uncertain so embrace it (11:1-6) - The phrase to "cast bread upon waters" refers to putting grain on ships for commerce, and the use of the plural points to diversifying)
• Life is short, enjoy it (11:7-10) - Live each day with gusto
• Express faith thoughtfully (12:1-2)
• Embrace aging thankfully (12:3-7)
• Life is mysterious, examine it (12:8-12) - Get wisdom from God; Christianity and Knowing God is not about search but finding
• Life is Obedience, express it (12:13-14) - Fear God and Keep His Commandments => so, the meaning of life in found in relationship with Him

The series ends with Psalm 92:12-15 - The Righteous will flourish even in old age.

Tears

There is something cleansing in shedding the tears of a heart in deep pain and sorrow.  And this is where I find myself.   No matter how much I prepared for this possibility, the reality of it just pierces the heart more deeply than I could imagine.

It's not just the loss of him specifically that I am grieving.   It's the embodiment of what this represents; it's the realization of my fear of rejection; and it's the doubts created by my insecurities.

Yet, I did say that I would trust God no matter the outcome; and I believe that He knows what is best for me.  So, maybe this is a test to see if that is true; and whether I still believe that His grace is sufficient for me.   I know that I will get through this; I do love God with all my heart, soul, and mind; and there is nothing on earth I desire more than HIM.    That has not changed, even in spite of my circumstances.

What I learn from this experience, is that my faith is still strong, though tested.  And that what I advised another person is demonstrated in my life.

Also, this experience ties a loose end, and I no longer have to ever wonder about it.  I also see that I will just continue what I have been doing - serving God wholeheartedly and letting HIM use me, no matter my circumstance.

Even in the midst of the disappointment and sorrow, I can see that God's Hand was in this.  He did not leave me to be utterly crushed; but showed me that there was some measure of interest and gave me the clear message that there was respect for my being a faithful servant, that I was an "impressive person", and that time spent together was enjoyed.

I trust that I learn and grow through all my experiences, this one included.

8-Sep:  God, in His wonderful love and caring, provided the reassurance and encouragement that I needed.  I've felt affirmed by several others; and I do feel that the self-esteem that was shaken has been restored.  I love my God who provides all that I need.   Amen!

25-Sep:  Looking back, I do think that overall, what I take away from this experience is that tying of the loose end; and knowing that I have been able to face my fear of rejection and come out of it stronger through God's guidance.

30-Sep:  There was a quote that stood out to me, spoken by the Mulan character in the "Once Upon a Time" show of all places:  "Your belief in love was not strong enough to overcome your fear of rejection."  Interestingly, what that says to me is that we would be willing to risk rejection if we found a love worth risking it for.

9-Oct:  I heard a quote today from Shakespeare's "Much Ado About Nothing" that I thought was beautiful:  "I love you with so much of my heart that none of it is left to protest with."   I would like to find One I would love that much.

1-Nov:  The Focus on the Family newsletter today talked about find the value in spouses; and I'm reminded how important it is that the person I am with would recognize my value.   Proverbs 18:22 says "The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD."


31-Jan:  Enough time has passed that I feel like I have been able to process and gain some perspective.  Looking back now, I can accept that this was likely for the best.  As I have learned more about the situation and about him, as well as having had time to think it through; I can see that there would have been challenges and I wonder if there are areas that he still needs to resolve and grow in.  So, I can truly say that I am resting in God's decisions for my life; and I entrust my future to HIM, waiting for His best for me.