It's interesting that the focus audience for this webinar were women in leadership; and those who were introverts but still became leaders talked about being called "quiet leaders", which is what I was called many years back. The main take-away I got was that we just need to figure out what we think and believe, and stick to that CONVICTION. This will help us cope with expectations geared more towards extroverts, understand ourselves better, and be able to focus on our strengths. Introverts tend to be more in-depth thinkers, will often work longer at solving problems, and maintain few but deeper relationships.
Most of the information provided I had learned along the way. This just re-affirmed my own conclusions. It was also re-iterated that Eastern cultures are more conducive to introverts in contrast to the Western culture where extroverts are in the majority.
Understanding that being an introvert is how we were created, just gives me permission to be myself. It's okay to need time to be by myself, to take time to think before answering questions, to better relate one-on-one than in a group, to prefer communicating through writing rather than speaking, etc. I am comfortable with being an introvert; and when I think back about when I first came to the realization that this is who I am and I didn't need to push myself to be aggressive and outgoing, it was back in high school when I first came across the passage in 1 Peter 3:4 that said, "but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God". I reasoned that if a gentle and quiet spirit was precious in the sight of God, then it was fine to be "Quiet."
3-Oct: As I've been reading the book, I have found that I can really relate to what it is saying. Some things that have stood out are that we have moved from a Culture of Character to a Culture of Personality. In many of my blog entries related to "Character", that is something I had lamented, though not in that exact wording. We live in a society that celebrates Extrovertism backed up with charisma and personality. And it's interesting that the book points out that research shows that Collaboration kills Creativity. To be most creative, innovative, and effective, we actually need solitude; for being around others is distracting, can have obstacles and challenges, etc. The author gave the illustration that even for great musicians, they are that way because of the many many hours of practice ALONE. In the leadership class on Sunday, I was able to experience first-hand, how a dominant extrovert made it difficult to share ideas from more introverted members in the group, even though those were valid and Biblically-based. Also, as I've been reading the book, I find that Introverts may actually make good leaders. My Assistant Pastor had pointed out that leaders should take time to listen and to not always be the one speaking all the time; and listening is something that Introverts tend towards by nature. In our culture, I do see how it is constantly emphasized that we should work collaboratively in a team; and it's neat to be affirmed that working alone can often be more productive.
19-Oct: It's actually encouraging to learn that while there are genetic factors that affect our Introversion, there are other influences that can help us to adjust and make a difference. The book talked about the "Orchid Hypothesis" - while high-reactive or sensitive people are generally introverted, they are more like orchids which "wilt easily, but under the right conditions can grow strong and magnificent".
9-Nov: Lately, I've been observing some behavior in the workplace that I would attribute the difference between how extroverts vs introverts address a problem. The extrovert tends to jump right in and try to try many different things right away, fixing one problem after another as it comes up. What then happens is that we often have to backtrack because we find that fixing the problem one way is not the best; and then it needs to be re-done; or that a less than ideal solution gets put into place. As an introvert, in two distinct cases, I clearly remember wanting to just step back, look at the big picture and evaluate the details of the problem first, before jumping in. Unfortunately, I did not follow my instincts, mainly because of the escalated situations, and decisions were really being made by others who were in authority. To be most effective, I really should utilize my experience and voice the need to not work in panic mode; but rather to thoroughly and carefully approach the solution.
9-Feb-2014: The section on introverts "acting" more extroverted resonated with me; because there are many situations where I do need to act more extroverted than I am comfortable with, like when I run meetings at work; or when I teach class at church. The book suggests that for introverts who take on extroverted roles, it is important to find time for "restorative niches". This helps me understand why I often need Sunday to be my true day of rest after church, since I've used up my energy being a leader and teacher in class. It's the same after I have run a meeting, I find I need some "downtime" to get ready for the next thing. It's also interesting that when relating to extroverts, we introverts may find that we need to make "free trait agreements", where we are given the time to be ourselves to recover from having to exert ourselves in extroverted situations. Also, it is good to know that while extroverts are better at picking up on social cues in social situations; introverts do better when observing rather than participating. It is because social situations become like "information overload" to us, making it difficult to pick up on details with conversational multitasking.
11-Feb-2014: Having finished the book, overall, I find that there is a lot of useful information to help understand introversion; and how to most effectively utilize the strengths and minimize the weaknesses of being an introvert. It is also important to build up the confidence of an introvert by finding something to focus upon where he/she would be able succeed or excel.
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