Friday, October 16, 2009

Tying Loose Ends


It's gotten to the point where I feel like things may start to unravel from having too many loose ends.  Each unfinished responsibility, by itself, would be manageable; but, to have so many makes me feel uncomfortably at risk.  So, I will do all I can to complete as many open items on my "To Do" list as possible.   Granted, there are some things that for whatever reasons, I will be unable to close or resolve; and they will still need to be left open; but, there are other things that I have been putting off due to lack of time and energy.  These, I am resolved to tackle this weekend. 

This reminds of the phrase, "When it rains, it pours".   At my Community Group last night continuing through the PeaceMaker study, I realized that because of the conflicts that I am facing, such as those at work, I've actually been needing ways to "escape" or "unstress", like watching movies or reading stories, taking me to situations remote from the stress and difficulty of daily life.  It's kind of like the article I read before, about why the movie industry is still thriving in our current economic times - people need something to help them, albeit temporarily, escape from the harsh realities of life.   As long as they do not hinder our ability to face our responsibilities and deal with our challenges, I think that temporary "escapes" are good for unstressing and unwinding, like vacations, retreats, music, etc.

Also, last night, we read the passage with Philippians 4:8, which again reminded me of my goal to keep my mind on things of the above.  I have been evaluating areas of my life to see where I could do better.  As my Father is holy, I do seek to be holy, to be set apart.  It is interesting that in 1 Peter, we've seen that holiness is actually an important part of being able to endure through suffering; for, it enables us to have a good conscience, to trust that God will judge justly, and reminds us that we are "strangers and aliens" for this world is not our home.

Through the PeaceMaker study, I am seeing that thus far, I've been more of a peacekeeper, than a peacemaker.   Peacekeeping is not as effective, and sometimes, it just means that it is a temporary peace, and battle breaks out again at a later time and all past unresolved conflict can resurface.   I tend to employ escape responses; and "silence" or "avoidance" is actually a form of "punishment" and "judgment" against the other person.  I do need to work better at communication and peacemaking.  Fortunately, though, as a phlegmatic personality type, I do fairly well in avoiding conflict; and I do generally "let things go".   I just need to ensure that I do truly "let things go"; and not merely put them on the back burner for a later time.

Of course, when I consider conflicts, I inevitably think back on my past experience in probably one of my most challenging conflicts.  I feel that through that experience, I did follow Biblical principles of still loving the person and trying to exhibit Christ-like character.   I feel that I could have communicated more clearly; and I will be wiser in the future in how I choose to invest in the lives of others.   However, as I try to understand the situation better, I think that what I can say is that what she was guilty of was deceit, hypocrisy, and slander.  It is interesting that most of these are referenced in 1 Peter 2:1.   In looking back, my heart was right and I am at peace that I did what was right.  I feel that full closure comes from being able to "tie up" all loose ends; and over time, I find that I'm able to do just that.

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